I'm on a quest for a new hairdresser. My previous one who has been engaging and competent for 5 years, whom I will call Mona, had a child and is mostly retired now. Her boss, Kate, who is quite well-known in Boston and grooms a number of my friends, was my first encounter with that swishy salon. While Kate cuts hair well, she never talked to me. In fact, she used our time to talk to her associates about personnel problems, which just upped my own stress level. I like to mellow out at a salon myself. So I dumped her for Mona, which shocked everyone. But Mona and I shared travel adventures and she filled me in the new hot spots and restaurants in the city. We had fun together and my hair looked consistently great.

Alas, but endings are part of life. So a few weeks ago, I tried Iris, at my local salon. She was highly recommended by three people and I had been to the salon for waxing and manicures and liked the energy of the place. I liked Iris too, but she darkened my hair a bit too much and cut my hair too squarely. Fortunately my natural curl has camouflaged this by now and it's okay. I've thought of going back to my previous salon before Kate and Mona, but the owner, who is a lovely woman, is also difficult to get an appointment with and she wanted me to get my hair colored twice a month which seems excessive to me. Often, I wake up one morning and want to get my haircut right away as it looks like a mop somehow--just overnight. So, going back seems like settling.

I tried another woman in another local salon who was again highly rated who gave me a good cut but I didn't like the look. So, in two weeks I will try Demetri who does a great job on my friend's hair and if that doesn't work, I'm going to Color Salon in Wellesley next. I have a friend in CA who drives an hour to get her hair cut beautifully for only $8.00, if you can believe it. Price is a whole other dilemma, as my experience has been that you get what you pay for in this fashion arena, even if you go to your appointment armed with photo's of what you want or a great photo of you with the right cut, etc.

As I get ready to explore contracts with agents and publishers this winter, this hairdresser metaphor has some important reminders about creative alliances:

1) Know what you want and communicate it up front
2) Any transition requires experimentation and may include flops, like disappointing hair cuts
3) Accept the truth about the availability and biases of potential partners
4) Don't allow yourself to be mistreated or manipulated
5) Follow your intuition as a guide to finding the best choice for you
6) There is always unique chemistry between individuals and you need to trust your own impressions and interactions with someone, not negate them because someone else raves about that person

All of our alliances are important and we want to affiliate with people who know and love us and are willing to be flexible. We want mutual relationships that are heart-warming and productive in which we can negotiate freely. I know I will find the right hairdresser again, I always do, but I have to be willing to suffer through a few glitches in the path to find him/her. The same will be true of publishing partners as well. Persevere and remember that you deserve an alliance that makes you feel and look great!

A Tool for Dealing with Rejection

My Conari friend, Brenda Knight, suggested that I interview BJ Gallagher for my next book. BJ and I connected and clicked so now we will both be supporting each other on projects. Thank you, Brenda. BJ sent me her new book: Yes Lives in the Land of No: A Tale of Triumph over Negativity (BK, 2006) which is a charming parable with humorous characters who remind us of all of the ups and downs of promoting a new creative work. It is a delightful read filled with great wisdom and courage. I strongly recommend it and will be re-reading it many times a year to stay inspired. Check out Yes Lives in the Land of No

Practice Intuition

My good friend Lynn Robinson has a wonderful new book called Trust Your Gut: How the Power of Intuition Can Grow Your Business which is an excellent resource which will help you to make critical business and life decisions. Lynn teaches you how to identify "power hunches", ask your intuition the right questions, generate profitable new ideas, use your guidance for creative solutions to difficult business challenges, and hire the right people! Thank you, Lynn, for another inspiring read! The link is: Trust Your Gut.

Beat the Holiday Blues and Blahs

Join my Cape Cod buddy,Olivia Miller, for a a special Stress Buster workshop at Open Doors Yoga Studio in Weymouth, MA on Saturday, December 9th from 1-4 PM. Olivia is an enlightened facilitator and yoga and meditation expert. I went to this workshop last summer and it was a marvelous way to learn to relax. and really get to know your chakras. Give yourself the gift of self-care this year. Call 781-335-3090 or go online at Open Doors7. For more info on Olivia and her decks, go to Ohmworks.com.

For Fiction Writers

Once again, it is time for A Room of Her Own Foundation's Gift of Freedom Award for fiction writers which is a $50,000 grant plus an incredible support system. This is the organization that I support and serve on the Advisory Council. Check out the application at A Room Of Her Own Foundation. Founder Darlene Chandler Bassett is creating an amazing legacy of women.

Happy Thanksgiving to all,

Creatively yours,
Gail McMeekin
http://www.creativesuccess.com Copyright, 2006. CreativeSuccess, LLC.